Playing Dad

Over the past several years, food has been an ever-changing issue in our lives. Even before we had our girls, Barbara and I were constantly re-evaluating the things we were buying at the store or where we were going out to eat or what we were eating when we went out. When we had decided we were going to bring a child into this world, my wife took it upon herself to focus on making our food intake "healthier". I think like most younger parents these days, we started hearing the "organic" buzzwords flying around...and so we jumped on that bandwagon because we thought that would be "the best" for our kids.

Over the next few years we went through various other dietary changes...all with the intention of making our lives healthier. The problem we discovered was that we wouldn't ever stick to a strict diet...that whenever we got busy or tired or just lazy, that we would abandon the "diet" and just go back to the things that we loved the most...which usually weren't all that healthy for us. At one point along the way, I made an interesting self-discovery. My wife had suggested to me the umpteenth diet change...and at that point I probably got a little too frustrated with her...and so I basically told her I was sick of it and wanted to stop.

After some discussion with her...and probably a lot more thought about it on my part...I figured out one important fact about all the diets we've been through. And that was, every time we went through one of these diets...after we had learned everything we felt we could from it...that even if we stopped doing the full-on diet, we always would take something from the diet that we continued to incorporate in our everyday food choices.

Most recently, we went to hear some people talk at Rethinking Everything that helped us to rethink and redefine our family. One of the big changes was to move more towards allowing our kids to decide what they want to eat and when...basically letting them decide when they were hungry and how much they should be eating...putting more trust in them and understanding that they know their bodies better than we do.

Now, that doesn't mean that they can eat whatever they want when they are around the house...we still have some "control" because we still buy whatever food that comes into the house...but they are more than welcome to any of the choices we do have at hand. So at those times when one of them might ask for something that's not in house...we just have to explain to them that we don't have that particular item...and then we show them all of the things that we do have. It's pretty easy for them make a choice from one of the healthy options we have...and they always enjoy what they're eating. It's amazing what the power of choice can bring to a child...empowering them so that they feel they control their own lives. And we're happy about it because they're eating the things that we like.

We do try to make a habit of not bringing any food items that we would consider "unhealthy" into our home. Now that doesn't mean that we don't go out to eat or occasionally buy "unhealthy" items...but we do try our best to do it as infrequently as we can. We buy organic foods when we can afford them...we buy lots of fruits, vegetables, and minimally processed foods...we've also stopped buying most foods with processed sugars in them (this is the most recent change).

Because my girls tend to snack off and on all day long, it's often the case that they don't eat a full meal at dinner...because they're just not hungry. Sometimes when we're around people that don't understand this, they think that we're not feeding our kids enough. What most frustrating from all this, is that I would expect that most everyone would see our food choices for our kids as good choices...that they would see how healthy and happy our kids are with what they eat...yet we still get comments about them. Sometimes we get comments about our 3-year old daughter that she's too skinny...yet she always eats every time she gets hungry. And I hate to mention it, but haven't these people seen my own physique? I weigh roughly the same weight that I did whenever I was in high school...I'm skinny now and I've always been skinny...high metabolisms will do that to you. My other daughter isn't as skinny (nor is she as small, in general)...and yet we haven't really changed our eating habits very much between the two of them. That's just the way each of their bodies are built...and I love them each for it.

We've also recently gone through some interesting discussions with my 14-year old son in regards to trying to figure out how to balance his eating habits within the family. In the past, every time I talked to somebody about how I felt like he ate too much...or that when he did eat, he chose to always eat the most unhealthiest options...I would always get the general response "but he's a growing boy...he should be eating like that". It just seems crazy to me how our society so easily finds excuses for our horrible eating habits.

What has amazed me the most recently has been seeing the transformation of both his body and his mind since he moved in with us about six months ago. As I had mentioned before, we don't have a lot of unhealthy food choices within the house...and so whenever he does choose to eat, he still gets to make the choice of what he wants to eat. He even has the option to go buy something unhealthy, if that's what he wants to choose to do. Yet within the last couple of months, he's made comments to me about how sick he feels whenever he tries to eat something unhealthy (such as a McD hamburger). And even though he sometimes complains about the food choices at our house...he still makes comments to me about how he likes that he's eating healthier and likes being skinny and not overweight.

Ultimately, I like knowing that he knows he still has a choice to eat whatever he wants...and yet he will still always ask for my approval when eating certain things...even though the answer I always give him is "You know it's your choice". I've even specifically asked him if that's how he felt to make sure it wasn't just in my own mind. Now that doesn't mean I don't tell him when I like or dislike something...and I don't try to manipulate him...but I explain to him why I would or wouldn't eat/drink whatever item he's asking about. And then he knows he's still free to make his own choice.

For now we are moving on with our life as usual...as a continual work in progress. And I'm sure we will have many other diets along the way...but as long as I still feel like we're doing the best for our family, we'll keep doing it no matter what other people might think.

Here's my next update to my original blog post...about the weapons I've found so far in Amalur. I went back and grabbed all the original Fate weapons that came with the pre-order and added them in here as well. I've also added more pics from other players who posted them in the KoA forums. I've updated the original post with these items as well if you missed the first round and first update.

Daggers: